Anyway, back to what I read through the communications.
I found out that Paul saw his Primary care Physician, Dr. Lindley and with some issues he found with Paul's legs he said that Paul needs to get some "stockings". Paul became extremely upset and acted out trying to let them know that he wants "socks" not "stockings". The new people in his life were unaware that Paul is very set on what is 'manly' and "stockings" are NOT 'manly'. He also has not been getting cleaned in the shower and his shower was filthy! Paul is a very clean person and when his basic care is being neglected he doesn't sleep, doesn't like who ever it is that isn't doing what is needed. Paul also does not like being left out of the decision making process.
Paul had EVERY reason to be ticked off and since he cannot express himself due to his TBI and physical inabilities, he acts out and doesn't want anyone near him.
Now...as I read all I could think was that these people are idiots!!!! They work with TBI clients and they cannot see beyond their own list of duties and figure out that Paul is upset for a reason and thet need to resolve the issue with Paul.
Over the past 24 years this is what we as a family have dealt with. I realize they are only human and as I continued reading I discovered that there were several new caregivers in his home who were not familiar with Paul and Paul was NOT familiar with them. His short-term memory is pretty non-existent and change (of any kind) affects Paul negatively.
After several minutes...ok about an hour :-) to calm myself...I sent a letter explaining the basic information that his caregivers need in order to get Paul more comfortable with them and in helping him adjust to the changes. Again, I needed to remind them that they need to contact me or a family member when issues with Paul come up.
Now that I am on Therap, I need to remain more diligent in keeping abreast of what is going on. Paul's comfort, security, safety physically and emotionally are my prime motivators. I am his voice and his advocate. The past 24 years has given me the unique insight to know he needs me to fight for him even when everyone...including other family members...do not agree or are not listening.
It is a privilege.
I found out that Paul saw his Primary care Physician, Dr. Lindley and with some issues he found with Paul's legs he said that Paul needs to get some "stockings". Paul became extremely upset and acted out trying to let them know that he wants "socks" not "stockings". The new people in his life were unaware that Paul is very set on what is 'manly' and "stockings" are NOT 'manly'. He also has not been getting cleaned in the shower and his shower was filthy! Paul is a very clean person and when his basic care is being neglected he doesn't sleep, doesn't like who ever it is that isn't doing what is needed. Paul also does not like being left out of the decision making process.
Paul had EVERY reason to be ticked off and since he cannot express himself due to his TBI and physical inabilities, he acts out and doesn't want anyone near him.
Now...as I read all I could think was that these people are idiots!!!! They work with TBI clients and they cannot see beyond their own list of duties and figure out that Paul is upset for a reason and thet need to resolve the issue with Paul.
Over the past 24 years this is what we as a family have dealt with. I realize they are only human and as I continued reading I discovered that there were several new caregivers in his home who were not familiar with Paul and Paul was NOT familiar with them. His short-term memory is pretty non-existent and change (of any kind) affects Paul negatively.
After several minutes...ok about an hour :-) to calm myself...I sent a letter explaining the basic information that his caregivers need in order to get Paul more comfortable with them and in helping him adjust to the changes. Again, I needed to remind them that they need to contact me or a family member when issues with Paul come up.
Now that I am on Therap, I need to remain more diligent in keeping abreast of what is going on. Paul's comfort, security, safety physically and emotionally are my prime motivators. I am his voice and his advocate. The past 24 years has given me the unique insight to know he needs me to fight for him even when everyone...including other family members...do not agree or are not listening.
It is a privilege.
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